"I'm going to call you Paige. But I can't call you Paige Dineen because you're no Katherine MacPhee. Anyway, that may lead to the purchase of male dolls to fill the roles of Walter, Toby, Sylvester, and Cabe. Not to mention Ralph. We can't do that.
Let's think about this. … You definitely appeal to my geek personality. I love those glasses. How about we call you Paige Turner? Get it? Paige Turner?"
"I think there is already a drag queen in New York City with that name. You're going to need to figure out something better. Maybe something a little more original and a little less corny."
"How do you know about Drag Queens in New York City?"
"I read, of course! You don't choose to look this geeky without being able to back it up."
"Well, I have decided I want to stay here, but I need to go shopping."
"For what? We have storage boxes full of clothing. What could you possibly need?"
"Isn't it obvious? I need a new body. I mean, look at you. You can even stand on your own."
"Well, you're right. That is an advantage. I can also scratch my nose and comb my own hair. I can sit in a chair or on a sofa, too! We looked for an appropriate body here, but there wasn't one your skin tone Before going shopping, I think you need to see someone."
"Someone? Who? The owner already picked me from all the Fashionista boxes at Walmart. And let me tell you, there were many to choose from!"
"Yes, but you have to get past Chaundra first."
"Chaundra?"
"The resident Hybrid Queen. She has to approve everyone."
"Forget your body! I want one like hers!"
"I'm sure you do, but my body is a Jamieshow 12 inch resin body that is ball-jointed, tied together with cording, and has hand-blushing. It's an expensive and rare body.
Anyway, before you get your hopes up, you will need to fill out the New Doll Residential Application. And don't miss any blanks or it will be tossed away and you'll have to start the whole process over again. There's only about 250 pages to complete."
"Now, I will finish getting ready for the party tonight. Another new resident has invited me over to watch the fireworks from her balcony and have champagne. If you'll excuse me…."
Across town, preparing for her guests arrival ….
"May your New Year be filled with joy, health, and happiness. May you experience the best life has to offer in 2016."